Alaska

#47 & #48 A near death experience and experiences with death.

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#47 The time you were the most terrified-your knees were knocking, your heart was racing, you could barely stand to be in your own skin.

Traveling in Alaska is so dependent on the weather.  If you were leaving the village you spent hours obsessing over online weather predictions.  The jet from Kotzebue could fly in just about anything but the little planes that went back and forth to the village were a different story.  Which, is good.  It gave you great confidence that they took your safety seriously.  But, when your flight got delayed you were very bummed.

One time another teacher and I had to go to Kotzebue for math training.  We flew in on a Wednesday afternoon and were going to get to fly back to Selawik on Friday.  Friday we sat at Bering air waiting for the afternoon flight to Selawik.  They delayed it, and then they ended up canceling it.  Dejected my colleague and headed back to the hotel to spend another night in Kotzebue.  Saturday morning we went back to Bering air and began the waiting game again.  The weather hadn’t improved that much, and the flight got delayed, but suddenly the sun came out and we were able to hop on the plane and leave.  Usually, the plane went straight to Selawik but the pilot informed us that we had to drop someone off in Noorvik.  No big deal.  We were headed in the right direction.  When we took off we had to go through a bank of clouds.  This part is very scary in a little plane.  You know that the pilot has instruments that let them know where you are but that means very little when you can’t seen anything around you but clouds.  You start thinking about Sweet Dreams that Patsy Cline movie where they come out of the clouds and hit a mountain.  We never really came out of the fog bank so it felt like we were flying blind the entire way to Noorvik.  There was a lot of turbulence and the plane was bouncing up and down.  I remembered thinking “This is it, this is how I’m going to die.”  I didn’t cry or scream.  I just sat there praying.  I thanked God for giving me a good life and I asked that my parents not be too sad about losing me.  All of the sudden the plane did a nosedive and I just held on.  But, we landed.  I almost passed out with relief.  We dropped the person off and then the pilot said that we would be going on to Selawik.  I remember thinking that I should get off the plane.  Sure, I didn’t know anyone in Noorvik but I knew I could sleep in the school.  I didn’t know what to do so I sat there.  We took off and it was much of the same but suddenly we came out of the clouds and it was perfect flying weather.  You could see Selawik gleaming in the distance.  It had never looked more beautiful.  When we landed I couldn’t decide if I should kiss the gravel runway or the pilot.  I kissed neither.  I patted him on the back and thanked him for getting us home safely.  He said, “Well, Selawik is going to be my home now because they closed the airport in Kotzebue.  I can’t go back until it clears up.”  Both my colleague and I offered to let him come to our homes for lunch and a place to crash (this was the village way.)  He politely declined.  When I got back to my house I called my cousin and her family in Kotzebue to tell her that I had made it back to the village.  They were pretty shocked that anyone had made it out.  “We only heard one plane and we figured it was just some nut.”  Yep.  That nut was me.

#48 The difference between the first death you remember and the most recent one.

There were many deaths in my young life that I don’t remember.  But the first memory I have of actually seeing someone who was dying and then going to their funeral was when Joe, Buffalo Wrestling’s number one fan died of cancer.  Joe and his wife Pauline lived for Bison Wrestling.  They were the age that grandparents should be so I kind of thought of them as my Buffalo Grandparents.  (Since my own grandparents were far away in Iowa.)  Joe had gotten sick and was on oxygen.  I remember my parents taking all of us kids over for a visit.  They had a little rat terrier that was so excited about seeing all of us little kids that it started running circles around the house and then it run up into my dad’s arms and peed all over him.  I remember it being one of the funniest moments of my childhood.  When Joe died, everyone was sad.  The funeral was at the funeral home in Buffalo.  I remember everyone wearing the school colors of purple and white.  All the wrestlers and their families were in attendance and my dad was a pall bearer.  Joe had served in the military and they did the military salute.  I remember being shocked how loud the guns were.

The last death I experienced was incredibly sad and painful because it was someone who was very young.  My best friend’s niece died after a long illness.  I took great solace in the fact that during all her time in the hospital, the family had a lot of time to talk, joke, laugh, cry and hold each other.  Everything that needed to be said got to be said.  The memorial service for this young girl was also at Peterson Chapel.  People who visited the family were given seeds to plant “forget me nots.”  There was also a theme about butterflies.  The mother of the girl who died, told me that “Butterflies need to be free.”  It was such a beautiful sentiment.  Now, every time I see a butterfly I think of this girl and smile.  I know that while we are sad that she is no longer on Earth with us, she is free and in the best place there is.

 

#37 & #38 One week to live.

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#37 If you had one week to live.
In a very mild form, I have experienced having one week to live.  When I lived in Alaska, I would get to spend Christmas and summer vacation in Minnesota.  Believe me,  I fit a lot of living into those chunks of time.  That is not to say that living in Alaska was bad.  It was a totally awesome!  But, when you lived in a village above the Arctic Circle there were many things that you couldn’t do.  You couldn’t go to the mall, you couldn’t go to a movie theater, when you went to the grocery store there wasn’t an unlimited selection of the things you wanted.  You were surrounded by a gorgeous paradise but you couldn’t go through the McDonalds drive through and order a Coke.  (Seriously, there is something so pure, good and wonderful about a coke from McDonalds.)  Therefore, the week before I headed back to Alaska I had a set of things that I had to do.  I would see as many movies as I could.  When people would ask to spend time with me I would suggest we go to a movie.  I remember one Christmas break where I managed to see ten movies.  I would also try to hit a few of my favorite restaurants.   I would make sure to go to House of Lo and have the best Chinese food  in the world and to Brooks to have one of their amazing omelets.  I also went high brow.  My friends Shawn and Sue would go with me to a fancy restaurant.  One year, we went to Oceanaire to get seafood.  (This was before I developed my shellfish allergy.) I decided that I was going to go all out and order the Maine lobster.  By the end of the meal, I had managed to spend about $100 and left the restaurant feeling like I had gone out with a bang.  It was raining as we left the restaurant running to the parking garage.  As we were walking to the car, Shawn or Sue said something funny and I lifted my head howling with an open mouthed laugh.  Wouldn’t you know it that was the exact moment a bead of water dropped from the ceiling of the parking garage into my mouth!!!!  I remember screaming and wanting to throw up but….. I had just eaten $100 of seafood!  I couldn’t throw up.  I wanted to but I didn’t.  True Story.

Even though I’m experienced at living like there were no next week, if there truly wasn’t a next week there would be a temptation to run off to Hawaii or Australia.  But, I would want to surround myself with my family and my friends.  I’d want to sit around and talk and laugh.  I’d want to make one last drive down to the farm in Iowa where my mom grew up.  I’d want to climb up into the grain bin and look out on the pasture.  I’d want to lay in the bed in guest room underneath one of the quilts that was made by my Grandma.  I’d want to hold and hug and kiss my nephews and my niece.  I’d want to talk to my Godchildren about keeping their faith alive.  I’d want to sit and answer a thousand questions from my dad.  I wouldn’t even get annoyed.  I would be sad because I was leaving all these awesome people behind but I would be happy knowing that I was headed to the BEST place.

#38  The next blockbuster medicine that will be invented and what will happen as a result.
Doctor’s will develop a shot that will cure autism.  But, many people who do not believe in vaccines will be wary of taking the cure.  Activists will clamor that there is no need for an autism shot.  They will argue that people with autism don’t need to change to fit society’s norms. Some will argue that everyone should be mandated to take this treatment.  Politicians and doctors will debate over who should pay for this treatment and if we should pay for this treatment. Ann Coulter will say something terrible and offend most of the people.  Michael Moore will chime in and offend the people who weren’t offended by Ann Coulter. I will be offended by both of them. The Supreme Court will refuse to take the case.  Been there, done that.  People will read the Dr. Suess book “The Sneeches.”  They will have to decide where they stand on the plain-belly vs. star bellied argument.  People will argue and people will end up doing what they want to do.  Like always.

#33 Life is a highway!

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saturn

#33 Tell the true story of a dramatic moment in your life, but weave in one secret and one lie.  
When I left Alaska I had all my ducks in a row.  I had a plan on what I was going to do and when I was going to do it.  When I got back to Minnesota I subbed for two years in Buffalo.  It seemed that while I was in Alaska, the market for social studies teachers had not changed. I had kind of thought that having five years of experience in one place would at least get me in the door for some interviews.  While I was subbing, I spent a lot of time filling in for special education teachers. The special ed teachers at the high school really took me under their wing.  They were constantly telling me that I was good with the kids and it was obvious I enjoyed what I was doing.  A few of them mentioned that I should go back to school and get licensed to teach special ed.  Finally, I decided to take their advice and in the summer of 2008 I started driving to St. Cloud for summer school. (This was that magical summer when gas cost $4.00 a gallon)  My partner in this mission was my 1995 Gold Saturn.  I LOVED this car.  I loved that it was a Saturn, I loved that it was gold, I loved that it was pretty reliable.  Heck, I even liked my license plate that said “HBT” we said that it stood for Heather Bakke’s Taxi.  My friends Shawn and Sue called it Golden Boy.  Golden Boy was the mythical perfect teenage boy that my dad always talked about in his classes. My car was the mythical perfect car! My car had almost 300,000 miles on it. I joked that the car was starting to fight off death, both side mirrors were gone, if you were in stop and go traffic you had to turn on the heat, and then the dome light disconnected from the ceiling.  It was hanging by the wires and kind of resembled a chandelier. It seemed to me that all of the scars were just cosmetic, until the 90 degree day in June when my beloved Saturn died at the side of the road.  I called a tow truck and was towed back to St. Cloud.  They told me that it would cost $80 to run a diagnostic to see what was wrong.  The guy told me that it probably wasn’t even worth $80.  I was in denial and sunk $80 in to the Saturn to delay what was truly inevitable.  I can’t even remember what was wrong with it, but it would have cost more to fix the car than it was worth.  I called my parents and asked them to come and get me and to bring several garbage bags to pack up all my stuff that was in the car.  I was so sad about my car, but I was even sadder when I thought about the fact that I had a good thing going in Alaska.  I was stupid to walk away from a guaranteed job and I was never going to find anything as good as I had up there.  Thankfully, the years healed many of those feelings.  I finished my special education license, became a special education teacher, and found a great job.  But, every time I see a gold Saturn driving down the road I get a little sad, wishing I still had my Golden Boy/Taxi.

#30 Five memories

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#30 Describe five memories-events you remember really well.  Then take one of them further.  
 1.  I made Al Franken laugh.  Before he ran for the Senate, Al Franken was writing political books and had started a PAC.  Critic’s of Franken said that the PAC consisted of Hollywood money.  When I went to one of his book signings, I said, “It was a pleasure to donate all of my Hollywood money to your PAC.”  That got him laughing.

 
2.  I went on an Alaskan cruise with Barbara and Eric H.  They had wanted to visit me in Alaska and we decided it would be fun to see a part of the state where none of us had gone.  When we were docked in Juneau we took a helicopter trip to Mendenhall Glacier. This was the first time I had seen a glacier and I was absolutely mesmerized by the blue color of the ice in the crevices.  I imagine the sky in Heaven is that color blue because it is absolutely perfect.

 

3.  Our senior year of high school we did Little Shop of Horrors and our school rented the costumes from UMD.   A group of us drove up to Duluth to pick up the costumes.  This car ride and day in Duluth is something that Shawn, Sue, Kerry and I still talk about.  It was the perfect day of the semi-freedom your senior year in high school provides.

 

4.  One time I threw a party out of spite. People were getting on me because I never had people over.  I didn’t want to have people over so I decided that I wanted to make sure that it was the lamest party ever.  I told everyone that the party was going to have a poetry reading.  I said everyone was going to have to read a poem.  It ended up being the best party I ever threw.
Here is the poem I wrote for the occasion:

 

The Tundra is like a movie theater floor
O.K. I’ve never seen popcorn covering tundra
like a theater is covered after a matinee of Lilo and Stich
But they are alike

Random pop cans (hey, we don’t sell that here)
candy wrappers
your shoes get sticky
both are hard to walk on
they have their own unique smell

They both take your breath away the first time you see them.
Why do you think they keep theaters dark?

5.  The day I moved to Alaska.

I shall expand on the the day I moved to Alaska….

The day I moved to Alaska I woke up at four in the morning to get to the airport.  I was taking an unusual flight path.  I was flying Minneapolis, to Chicago, to Seattle, to Anchorage, to Kotzebue.  I was taking that route because I had gone for the cheapest airfare.  Even the cheapest ticket was super expensive.  My brother Shawn ended up loaning me the money to buy the ticket. (Don’t worry, I paid him back.)  My Dad, my brother Eric and my sister Heidi drove me to the airport.  This was about a month before the September 11th terrorist attacks so they were able to go all the way to the gate with me.  We sat and waited for me to get on the plane.  It was a pretty solemn occasion.  A few minutes before boarding started I went and used the restroom.  When I came out Barbara and Eric H. were standing there holding signs that said “Alaska or Bust” and “We will miss you Heather Lena”  it was pretty adorable.  There were lots of tears and I said my goodbyes.

When I got to Seattle I used a payphone to call home to tell them that I had made it as far as Seattle.  When my mom answered, she told me that Eric was in the hospital with pneumonia.  She joked that my moving to Alaska almost killed Eric.  Thankfully, he didn’t die.

In Anchorage, things started to get a little more real.  When we flew in to the city I saw the mountains and I realized that this was the first time I had ever seen a mountain.  When I got off the plane I stood at a large window just looking at the mountains.  The gate area had a huge stuffed bear. The people waiting in the gate area looked like people who were going on a camping trip.  I found a chair and sat waiting for the flight to Kotzebue.  While I sat staring into space I heard people mumbling, “Do you think that’s Faith’s cousin?” (My cousin Faith had been teaching in Alaska for quite a few years and had told her friends to be on the lookout for me in the airport.)  I turned and waved at the people and told them that I was Faith’s cousin.  Talking with them helped calm my nerves.  I had no idea what I was getting into and it made me happy to know that these ladies had survived and loved it.  They assured me that if they could do it, I could do it to.

When we got to Kotzebue we had to exit the airplane walking down the steps on to the runway.  This was a first for me.  When we walked into the airline terminal there were a bunch of people there to welcome everyone.  I was met by my cousin’s husband and their little girl.  We grabbed my bags and went outside and strapped them on to the four wheeler.  I took my first ride on a four wheeler with four bags and three people.  We went straight to the welcome barbecue and when I got off the four wheeler I noticed that my jeans were splattered with mud.  I was really embarrassed thinking I’d make a horrible impression but it turned out that no one noticed or cared.  That night I got to meet a bunch of teachers from Selawik.  It was so much fun to put faces with the names I had heard.

After the picnic we went to Faith’s house and I played outside with her daughter.  Their house was right on Kotzebue sound so we spent a few hours throwing rocks into the water.  I was starting to get tired and I looked at my watch and it was 1 AM!!!  It was still bright at day out.  Alaska was three hours behind Minnesota so my brain was thinking it was 3am.  I had been awake for 23 hours.  Eventually, I was able to lay down and go to bed.  A pretty successful first day in Alaska.